Wednesday, 3 August 2011

Screw Those Kids' Magicians

I mean, seriously, fuck 'em all. Those lame-ass douche-bags wouldn't know an ACAAN from a packet trick, those bozos.

They come to us, with their balloon "magic", and their "magic" colouring books. They think they own the frigging place. Goddamit. I don't resent, AT ALL, the number of bookings they receive. I couldn't CARE LESS how much they might make in just one weekend. FUCK 'EM!!! THEY CAN GO AND SUCK THEIR LAME-ASS TT GIMMICK SILK GODDAM SHIT-FOR-WEATHER FUCK-BRAN, CAN GO EAT ITSELF FOR BREAKFAST, LUNCH AND FREAKING DINNER, POSING-POUCH CRAB-MEAT SHIT-BRICKS !!

For all I care.

I don't mind those guys. But......

No passes.

No under-spread controls.

No triple push-overs.

And STILL they win their "made-up" awards. I guess that's just the 'size of my heart'*.


*p.s. And Trudie Styler can kiss my ass.**

** as can Russ Farquhar***

*** as can Shawn Stevens


  1. But Barry.... I been performing kids magic for so long.... I know I never made up a trick, or originated anything.... but I made 'em laugh Barry, I really did......

  2. Ohhh..... uh huh huh huh huh huh huh haaaaargh,.....

    It's the end......